So, did I tell you that not too long ago my therapist and I decided to change up my medications? Yeah. We did. I switched from a low dose of one antidepressant to a slightly higher dose of another (this one to this one).
It’s like a fog lifted.
At first I didn’t credit the drugs, of course. But about two weeks into the new regiment is when I began feeling like it was time to do something about my food. Another two weeks into the change and I felt like going for a walk now and again.
I finally realized it might be because of the meds when my mother stopped annoying me.
My depression/mood stuff is weird; it always manifests as anger and brittleness and hyper-sensitivity. I know, big shock, right? So any time I have the capacity to let shit roll of my back – without having to try to force myself to go through the traditional recovery “3 As” (awareness, acceptance, action) process of coping with, well, everything – is a damn good thing.
Best of all I feel more centered, more patient, and WAY more productive. This is a very good thing as I’ve taken on a couple of new clients and writing gigs (in our ever-elusive goal of actually building up savings and emergency funds – IT WILL HAPPEN!) and I’m sure you spotted the sponsored post, so I’m doing more now on a weekly basis once again.
But I’m happy. Seriously, I’m happy.
The food thing continues to work well and easily. It’s just so easy and simple. I’m cooking for myself every day and eating delicious food that is both savory and filling. I’ve lost weight too; I don’t want to be number focused but it’s clear that my clothes fit better and my face is thinner. But more importantly, I feel so much better. I’m somewhat shocked by it; I’ve never before given up all grains when I’ve changed my food habits (including oatmeal!) and it’s made a massive difference in how I feel.
Not only that, but the tossing out of forced family dinners has been phenomenal. I seriously cannot believe how much better it is, how much we’ve reduced our take-out habit, and how easily the family is getting along without forcing ourselves to all eat the same thing at the same time. Tori and have started hanging out upstairs after she eats, playing games and sitting in the big bed, cuddling and talking. Sometimes we play math or word games on my phone together. My mother and Charlie watch the news together in peace.
Everyone is happy.
And damn if this isn’t a weird ass post to write. Heh.